This post isn’t to endorse or condemn either of this year’s presidential candidates. It IS acknowledgement that people are shaken by the election of Donald Trump as president. For many, the uncertainty and fear translates into depression and anxiety. If Hillary Clinton had won, there’d be a lot of Trump supporters suffering in similar fashion. So I would have been writing this post anyway. The big question is how to move forward if the election has…  [Read More]

The morning after Donald Trump was elected president, I posted this: I didn’t vote for Trump. I don’t like him. I didn’t like Bush, either. But the left survived Bush and the right survived Obama. We’ll survive Trump, too. If we as individuals keep doing our best every day and be the blessing to friends, family and colleagues, everything will be fine. A better world starts with you. I also posted this, after seeing a Trump…  [Read More]

I’ve been going through a major bout of insecurity lately as a result of juggling so many responsibilities at once. We all go through this on occasion, so I don’t claim to be a special snowflake in this regard. In an effort to feel a little less overwhelmed, I turned to a tool I should use more often: list making. After writing it all down, I find that I’m not quite as screwed as first thought….  [Read More]

One Woman’s Experiences Show How Nasty The Internet Can Be

by Bill Brenner August 17, 2016 Dealing with life

We’ve all seen how nasty the Internet can be. Scroll Facebook, Twitter or any number of blogs on a given day and you’ll see people going out of their way to rip each other apart in the most cowardly way possible — hidden in the shadows. Many of us have stories about being attacked online. Usually, it’s because we offered an opinion people disagreed with. But Amanda Nickerson has been living with something a lot more…  [Read More]

Why the Hell Am I Still Sober?

by Bill Brenner August 3, 2016 Addiction

This is the second in a series of posts about navigating through the unexpected. It’s based on experiences I’ve had since my father’s death last year. A lot of legal paper pushing, hand-holding and arguing has gone into managing the building my late father left in my care. I’ve never dealt with lawyers so much in my life. Sorting out the various trusts, deeds, real-estate negotiations and environmental cleanup tasks has been a full-time job on…  [Read More]

Time to Stop Separating Women from Men

by Bill Brenner July 30, 2016 gender issues

A few years ago, I used to do a bunch of lists of security people to follow on Twitter every Friday. For a while I did a separate one on “women in security.” That is, until one of my peers called me out on it. Essentially, my friend, Wendy Nather, said that I was contributing to sexism in the industry by separating the women from the men. That’s how I took it, anyway. She was…  [Read More]

This Wasn’t Part of the Plan

by Bill Brenner July 26, 2016 Dealing with life

This is the first in a series of posts about navigating through the unexpected. It’s based on experiences I’ve had since my father’s death last year. I’ve tried to follow the words of Winston Churchill, who once said, “If you’re going through Hell, keep going.” I’ve had shitty years before — 1984, when my brother died, the year following my best friend’s suicide in 1997, and 2004, when another close friend died and I came closest to an emotional…  [Read More]

Vote Your Conscience and Get Off My Lawn

by Bill Brenner June 23, 2016 Political discourse

I’ve been mostly silent about this year’s presidential contest. Since I’ve been pretty opinionated about such things in the past, this has worried some of my loved ones. And so, for this one post, I will tell you what I think. Mood music: My worldview is much different than it was in my younger years. I used to think the fate of humanity hinged on each election. If the candidate I supported was in a…  [Read More]

To the Self-Righteous People Who Need a Pat on the Back

by Bill Brenner June 21, 2016 Communication skills for the crazy

I’ve mentioned before that kids today are addicted to accolades, that being told how awesome they are has become more important than actually achieving anything. It’s time to be fair to the kids and admit it’s not just them. We adults are just as bad — maybe even worse. Mood music: Armed with Facebook and Twitter accounts, we adults have the power to communicate like no other time in the past. And a lot of us use them…  [Read More]

Living in the Precious Present (If You Can Find It)

by Bill Brenner June 6, 2016 Communication skills for the crazy

One of the basic traits of someone with OCD is an inability to live in the moment. Learning to do so is one of my big projects at the moment.   I’m better at living in the precious present than I used to be. I can remember being a kid, always daydreaming about the future: what I’d look like and how cool my life would be if I were thinner, the clothes I would wear,…  [Read More]