May 2010

Dirt Bag

May 28, 2010 Mental disorders

The author admits he’s not a very good person when he lets the demons out. Mood music for this post: “A Rat Like Me” by Motley Crue: [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CgiMffbYz1c&hl=en_US&fs=1&] A liar. A hater. Thinking you’re better than other people. These actions describe me pretty well. Not so much today, Thank God. But when the addictions are [...]

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Prozac Summer, Part 2: Timing’s Everything

May 27, 2010 Depression

The author has a meeting with Dr. Prozac, and learns a couple things about dosage and timing. Turns out the two are connected. Mood music for this post: “Show Me How to Live” by Audioslave: [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vVXIK1xCRpY&hl=en_US&fs=1&] So I’m back from an appointment with Dr. Prozac, who I introduced you to this morning. I’m staying at [...]

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Prozac Summer

May 27, 2010 Depression

The author on the tricky balance between Prozac and sunlight. Mood music for this post: “Times Like These” by The Foo Fighters: [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rhzmNRtIp8k&hl=en_US&fs=1&] This post is a sequel to Prozac Winter, which I wrote back in January. Back then, I was experiencing some hefty mood swings, which is pretty normal for me at the start [...]

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Just a Little Patience

May 26, 2010 Addiction

I recently stumbled upon this live version of GnR’s “Patience” and wanted to post it here because it’s always been an inspirational song to me. Being an OCD-wired control freak with a knack for impatience and  endless attempts at recovery before I finally pulled it off, patience was a virtue I simply did not possess. [...]

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It’s a Disease, Not a Choice

May 26, 2010 Addiction

An open letter to those who are angry with a loved one whose addictions are off the rails. Mood music: This is one of those posts where I’m leaving names out to protect privacy. Still, the person this is meant for will know it’s for them, and he/she will be pissed at me. But that’s [...]

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Shamed to Death

May 25, 2010 Fear and anxiety

Why do people with mental and physical illness choose a slow, painful death over recovery? Mood music for this post: “Estranged” by Guns N Roses: [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dpmAY059TTY&hl=en_US&fs=1&] Last week I went on a tirade against firms putting limits on coverage for mental health care. It’s the same sorry song that ratchets up the fear level for [...]

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Pills Can’t Kill Pain at the Source

May 24, 2010 Addiction

The author has written much about his binge-eating addiction, but not so much about the pills — until now. Mood music for this post: “I Don’t Like the Drugs But the Drugs Like Me” by Marilyn Manson: [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6EefPcht54c&hl=en_US&fs=1&] A fellow addict in OA recently asked me how pills fit into my overall haze before I [...]

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Howie Mandel Fights The Stigma

May 23, 2010 Courage

Truth be told, I’ve never been much of a Howie Mandel fan. I liked his brand of humor in the beginning but eventually lost interest. But I give him a lot of credit for being open about his own struggle with OCD and taking the fight to The Stigma: [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xiZ84SZcPps&hl=en_US&fs=1&]

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Hitting Bottom: Songs and Backstory

May 23, 2010 Addiction

Hitting bottom is the moment of truth for an addict, whether the shackles are made of heroin, booze or food. I’ve been there. You have a choice: Clean up your act or die a painful death that can be either quick or slow. People ask me all the time about my big moment. The answer [...]

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Prozac or Potatoes: Which is Better?

May 22, 2010 Food

The author votes for some of each. Though only 2 ounces of potato at a time. Mood music for this post: “We’re All Gonna Die” by Iggy Pop and Slash: [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XJ5Rmt7jYhQ&hl=en_US&fs=1&] At the suggestion of my friend Christy Hubbard, I decided to check out Kathleen Des Maisons’ book “Potatoes Not Prozac.” She suggested I take [...]

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