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Sleep or Exercise: Which Matters More?

I’ve been trying hard of late to get my exercise regimen back on track. But I keep hitting the same wall: sleep. Specifically, I can’t get my ass out of bed at the appointed time so I keep missing my workout window.

Mood music:

For a guy who used to obsessively walk 3.5 miles a day no matter the weather or amount of rest, this is baffling. True, I am pushing my mid-40s. But really, this shit still seems harder than it should be.

I’m not a sedentary guy. I usually take the stairs instead of the elevator at work. I run up and down three flights of stairs in my house all day. Erin and I take regular walks. Hell, I climbed all the way to the top of the Bunker Hill Monument last week!

But it’s not enough.

I know what I have to do. But I have to get around this fairly new problem of sleep getting in the way. I’ve always been an early riser. But to work out first thing in the morning, I need to be up by 4 a.m., and that’s not happening. It’s as if my body is staging a sleep protest, refusing to budge before 5 a.m. The simple answer is to exercise later in the day, except that life has a habit of getting in the way.

About now the reader is saying, “For crying out loud, just do it!” I can hear one of my tough-guy friends saying, “This post is escapism and blame.” I can see all those “Your Excuse Is Invalid” memes on Facebook.

Yes, yes. I know.

I have plenty of fresh motivation to get over this hump. A lot of friends my age are engaged in some serious weight-lifting programs. I know a lot of dedicated runners and swimmers. They do it, and so can I.

What I need to figure out is how to break through that first, most stubborn wall — the urge to stay in bed.

Man asleep on barbells

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Drinking at Security Cons

A friend from the security community, Rob Fuller, has written a post about drinking at conferences. It’s an activity I engaged in with abandon until I decided to quit drinking on New Year’s Day 2010. His post reminds me of what the transition to sobriety was like in conference settings.

I drank my way through the first few RSA conferences to cope with nerves. You could drink all you want for free at the vendor parties, so it was an easy crutch to grab for. At RSA 2010, I was in hell. I stayed sober but didn’t know quite how to behave or deal with people who were drunk. I looked back at my posts from that week, and found this snapshot of what I was feeling:

So here I am in San Francisco for the RSA conference and Security B-Sides events. I’m at a lot of events that involve drinking and instead of wine I’m sucking down club sodas and Red Bull. And, truth be told, I still have trouble feeling at ease in the crowd without the wine buzzing beneath the skin of my forehead.

Fortunately,  each subsequent event got easier for me, and now I’m at ease in a crowd full of drinkers. I also realized from the beginning of sobriety that there is a support system. People have held AA meetings during RSA and ShmooCon. And when you let it known you are no longer drinking, there are people who look out for you. Getting that support from the outset definitely helped cement my affection for the security community.

I’ve been asked more than once if I ever get pressure to drink at these events.

Never.

In his post, Rob wrote that he believes there’s too much drinking going on and wants his peers to throttle back.

It’s certainly not an issue that’s unique to the security community. I know people from other industries who tell similar tales of drinking and debauchery at conferences they attend.

Do conference attendees drink too much? Do they need to get better control of themselves? I think it really depends on the individual. Most people handle their liquor just fine. I wish I had that ability. It really comes down to whether the individual feels they have it together.

If you feel like conferences are nothing but a blur of hangovers and you don’t like it anymore, you probably need to consider a modified lifestyle.

Of course, someone with a drinking problem can think they have it together but be a total wreck. If conferences are nothing but a drunken blur, whether you like it or not, you should sober up.

I’m just grateful I found a way through my own challenges.

men toasting each other

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A Plot Twist to Cure a Bad Mood

This old bastard woke up angry this morning. For two hours, I’ve wanted to punch objects and shout at people. I’ve done neither, but I still suck to be around right now. The rest of the day need not be this way.

I keep thinking of a post I wrote a while back about life’s plot twists and the lessons therein. When problems arise, embrace them, I said at the time. Roll with the punches. Catch the curve balls. Clichés like that.

Mood music:

http://youtu.be/irskrVvKR1E

It’s good advice for someone like me, whose OCD makes schedule changes seem like calamities. But in that context, plot twists are all the inconvenient, annoying and bad things that throw the best-laid plans into turmoil. I woke up in turmoil, so I’m looking for some reverse plot twists: unexpected developments that convert a shitty day into an excellent one.

It’s happened before. There was the day a bad commute got under my skin and I thought the rest of the day would rot my soul. Then I found out I was getting a promotion and a raise.

There have been times when a movie I wanted to see was sold out and, though pissed, I got tickets for another film that turned out to be glorious.

There have been days I thought I’d crumble under the weight of an overpacked schedule. Then a series of cancellations made it all better.

It’s only 7:30 a.m. as I write this, so there’s plenty of time for this day to be salvaged.

Meantime, I’m going to sit in my cube, drink coffee and listen to The Stooges. Approach with caution.

Middle Finger Mushroom Cloud

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New Doctors, New Pressures

Late last year, as I was looking for a new therapist to replace the one who retired, I decided to clean the slate and get a new primary care physician, too.

Choosing a new doctor can be a difficult process. We can get comfortable with the doctors we have, even if they’re not doing us any good. We might not like doctors at all, making us resistant to seeking one out.

But if we all need help maintaining our mental and physical health. When we have mental or physical issues that need frequent monitoring, doing nothing is a perilous proposition.

So I cleaned the slate and it’s been good. But it hasn’t been without pressure.

Mood music:

I found a therapist I believe is a perfect fit. We’ve been working specifically on reshaping my daily routine so that I remember to spend time on the mindfulness techniques I learned a year ago. The only problem is that it’s an hour-drive to reach her. That can be a pressure in itself. But the work of maintaining all the progress I’ve made in recent years compels me to suck it up. Better to drive far for a good therapist than drive down the street for a shitty one.

The new medical doctor has caused me more stress. Or, more accurately, it’s what he found.

Despite a diet devoid of flour and sugar, where most meals are carefully measured, I managed to gain close to 20 pounds last year. The problem was that I made adjustments to the diet but didn’t up my exercise to compensate. I also got a bit sloppy with my food during business travel, and I travel a lot.

My cholesterol went up with my weight, and so did my blood pressure, to the point where the doctor put me on medication.

I spent the better part of December angry with him. I didn’t like that he was trying to tell me how to eat or which piece of exercise equipment to buy. But my anger was misdirected. I was really pissed with myself for not being more careful.

My new therapist helped me to see that — proof that she’s worth the long drive.

So I’ve doubled down: I tightened my food plan and increased my exercise. I found an elliptical in our price range and turned a corner of the garage into a mini-gym where Erin and I plan to exercise together once the rest of her equipment arrives.

I’ve used the machine almost daily, and I’m down 9 pounds. The blood pressure is down, too.

I’m much happier since I decided to own up to things and accept the new course set by new doctors.

As it is when dealing with addiction, the first step is to admit you even have a problem. Once you take that step, the rest becomes more manageable.

Elliptical machine

My new machine.