Bill Brenner

What’s YOUR Insanity?

by Bill Brenner May 23, 2011 Addiction

“Paint a garbage can platinum and underneath, it’s still a garbage can.” Nikki Sixx In Chapter 3 of the AA Big Book, we’re introduced to an alcoholic named Jim. He has a successful business until he starts drinking at age 35 in an attempt to dull a nervous tick, and everything goes to hell. From pages 35-36: “In a few years he became so violent when intoxicated that he had to be committed. On leaving the…  [Read More]

Talk About The Weather

by Bill Brenner May 23, 2011 Depression

New England has been mired in a soupy, cloudy, downright dreary weather pattern for most of the last week or so. We were teased with sunshine Saturday, only to be tossed back under the clouds Sunday. For someone prone to mental illness, this is hell. Mood music: Like most people with mental ticks, too much of this weather is bad for my well being. It throws me into a prolonged period of discouragement and depression….  [Read More]

Who Raptured My #!&% Tire?

by Bill Brenner May 20, 2011 Fear and anxiety

All this talk about The Rapture has me thinking. Allow me to share. Mood music: First, this whole thing reminds me of a day in fifth grade when I was scared out of my brains by a prediction that the world would end because of something called the “Jupiter Line-up,” in which all the planets in the solar system were supposed to shift orbits and crush us all like bugs in the process. This was…  [Read More]

In Big Families, Drama Happens. Get Over It

by Bill Brenner May 19, 2011 Family

When we fall prey to our demons, we almost always cite family dysfunction as the cause and not our own bad decisions. I’m certainly guilty of that one. Mood music: Many times in this blog, I’ve cited my brother’s untimely death, my estrangement from my mother and various other family dramas as triggers for much of my OCD behavior and addictive pursuits. I don’t take anything back. Our personal history is an important guide when…  [Read More]

The Easier, Softer Way

by Bill Brenner May 18, 2011 Addiction

A reader asked me the other day if I still take medication for OCD. Yes, I told him. He told me that when he was diagnosed with OCD, he thought about trying something other than therapy or meds, but after a while realized that it wasn’t that easy. He’s right. Mood music: I know a lot of people who have struggled to control their own addictions and mental illnesses using alternative methods. Many times it works…  [Read More]

Say Hello To My New Friend

by Bill Brenner May 18, 2011 Addiction

One of the great things about writing this blog is that it puts me in touch with some cool people. Yesterday was one of those days. Meet my newest friend, David Vanadia. He contacted me yesterday after seeing my post about how flour and sugar nearly destroyed me. It turns out he was a sugar addict who gave it up in 2005 and has been blogging about it ever since. Check out the blog, Sugar Blog:…  [Read More]

How Flour & Sugar Nearly Destroyed Me

by Bill Brenner May 17, 2011 Addiction

When people ask about my giving up flour and sugar, they have an easy time grasping the raw health benefits. What’s harder for them to understand is how these things can form a mixture as addictive as heroin. Here’s my attempt to explain it. First, the point I need to make is that for us addicts, the substance isn’t the root of our problem. Two other things bring us down: –A hole in our soul…  [Read More]

The Cop Who Pulled Me Over

by Bill Brenner May 16, 2011 Uncategorized

A couple years ago a plain-clothes cop in an unmarked car pulled me over for veering into the breakdown lane right before the 128 North exit to 93. A guy in my 12-Step study group looks just like him, and for months I’ve wanted to ask if he was the one. Mood music: If this was indeed the guy, I wanted to make amends. The thing is, I have a history of being a hothead…  [Read More]

Monthly Awareness Causes: The Numbing Effect

by Bill Brenner May 16, 2011 Political discourse

I usually skip writing about “awareness” months because I’ve found that, whether I write about it or not, these things cause eyes to glaze over. Call me a pessimist or an idiot — I’ve been both at various times. But I can’t help feeling this way. Mood music: I think it’s great that we set aside a month here and there to drum up some extra attention for our causes, and it’s better to do it…  [Read More]

Back Story Of THE OCD DIARIES

by Bill Brenner May 14, 2011 Addiction

Since I’ve been adding new readers along the way, I always get questions about why I started this thing. I recently expanded the “about” section, and that’s a good starting point. But more of a back story is in order. Mood music: Before I started THE OCD DIARIES in December 2009 with a post about depression hitting me during the holidays, I had always toyed with the idea of doing this. The reason for wanting…  [Read More]

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