OCD

Pouring Gas on the Fire

by Bill Brenner March 31, 2010 Adventures in writing

People in recovery often go into hyper mode, making up for time wasted in the grip of addiction. Mix in some OCD and here’s what happens… Mood music for this post: “Gasoline” by Audioslave: [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H6_C4rV7x-Y&hl=en_US&fs=1&] I was talking to a dear friend this morning about the radio show I was pushing in my last post, SixxSense, and how the show’s host, Motley Crue bassist Nikki Sixx, has been a hurricane of activity since he became…  [Read More]

The Bright Side of Exhaustion

by Bill Brenner March 26, 2010 Coping tools

Mood music for this post: “So Tired,” by The Beatles: [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NZf9ncOQ2xM&hl=en_US&fs=1&] I don’t particularly enjoy lying around. To be idle is to not be living. Even back when I was holing myself up in a dark room or dragging my mentally exhausted ass to the couch for hours at a time, I didn’t really like it. But back then I was pinned to the wall by depression and his partners in crime: fear and anxiety….  [Read More]

An OCD Diaries Primer

by Bill Brenner March 20, 2010 Addiction

A collection of posts that form the back story of this blog. Mood music: [spotify:track:19n9s9SfnLtwPEODqk8KCT] The Long History of OCD An OCD Christmas. The first entry, where I give an overview of how I got to crazy and found my way to sane. The Bad Pill Kept Me from the Good Pill. How the drug Prednisone brought me to the brink, and how Prozac was part of my salvation. The Crazy-Ass Guy in the Newsroom….  [Read More]

Outing Myself

by Bill Brenner February 22, 2010 Adventures in writing

The author on why he chose to “out” himself despite what other people might think. Mood music: [spotify:track:1Qdnvn4XlmZANCVy3XjrQo] A couple friends have asked why I “outed myself” in this blog. Wasn’t I afraid people would blackball me at work? Don’t I worry that I’ll be defined by my struggle with OCD above all else? It’s a fair question. First, let’s get the notion of “courage” and “bravery” off the table. Some have used those words…  [Read More]

What Kind of Day It Has Been

by Bill Brenner February 16, 2010 Addiction

The author’s day has not gone as planned. He’s OK with that, though he wasn’t always. Mood music for this post: “Adrift And At Peace” from NIN: [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iMnv8zrmAyU&hl=en_US&fs=1&] This day has not gone as planned. I wanted to be in the office today plowing through some work. But another winter storm forced me to work from home. Some would say it’s great I can do that, and it is. But when there’s a lot on…  [Read More]

Selfish Bastard

by Bill Brenner January 30, 2010 Addiction

The author has found that service is an excellent tool for OCD management. Simply put, it forces him to stop being a selfish bastard. In OA, those of us in recovery from our compulsive eating disorders rely on a set of tools that go hand in hand with the 12 Steps. There’s the plan of eating, writing, sponsorship, the telephone and literature. There’s anonymity. And there’s service to others. The plan of eating is what’s…  [Read More]

Why So Serious? The Case for Self-Deprecation

by Bill Brenner January 29, 2010 Depression

The author on why self-deprecation is a handy tool for controlling demons. Mood music: [spotify:track:0g1HLSNG4KxjDXdeYMnLym] A few readers have told me I put myself down too much in these blog posts. Since I’m really not trying to put myself down — I do have a monster ego, after all — it’s time to say a bit about the power of self-deprecating humor. It’s true that I like to poke fun at myself. I do it…  [Read More]

How I’m Feeling

by Bill Brenner January 28, 2010 Addiction

As I mentioned in my posts Prozac Winter and The Mood Swing, I recently went up 20 milligrams on the Prozac because of the depression that tends to set in during the winter. [For more on the background, see The Bad Pill Kept Me From The Good Pill and An OCD Christmas] I’m three weeks into the higher dosage and it’s working — mostly. I woke up feeling blue this morning and still feel that…  [Read More]

Understanding Mental Disorders: The Brain as an Engine

by Bill Brenner January 26, 2010 Addiction

I’ve written a lot about my use of Prozac as just one of many tools to treat my OCD. [See The Bad Pill Kept Me From The Good Pill] Mood music: As a result I’ve gotten a fair amount of questions about the true value of anti-depressants. I’m not a doctor, so don’t take my perspective as Gospel. Also remember there’s no one-size-fits-all solution here. What I write here is based on my own personal…  [Read More]

Have Fun With Your Therapist (A.K.A.: The Shrink Stigma)

by Bill Brenner January 20, 2010 Addiction

Mental-illness sufferers often avoid therapists because the stigma around these “shrinks” is as thick as that of the disease. The author is here to explain why you shouldn’t fear them. Mood music for this post: “Just Another Psycho” by Motley Crue: [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ko23M-4AAbg&hl=en_US&fs=1&] It’s a funny thing when I talk to people suffering from depression, addiction and other troubles of the mind. Folks seem more comfortable about the idea of pills than in seeing a therapist….  [Read More]

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