Parenting

Maybe People Pleasing’s Not So Dumb After All

by Bill Brenner October 20, 2010 Love

One of the more popular posts I’ve written in this blog is about how stupid it is to be a people pleaser. Lately, I’m having a small change of heart. Mood music: [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nFl0nlHaWa4&fs=1&hl=en_US] I still stand behind much of what I said. When it comes to trying to please the overlords of corporate America or the abusive parent in hopes that you won’t get hit again, people pleasing IS futile. Here’s the dark side of…  [Read More]

Do it for the Kids

by Bill Brenner October 13, 2010 Children's issues

When I was a kid my parents were always trying to get me to join different organizations: The Jewish Community Center off of Shirley Ave. in Revere, Camp Menorah, etc. I rebelled against all of it. Now here Erin and I are, pushing Sean and Duncan into the Cub Scouts. Mood music: [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zt7exeJblR0&fs=1&hl=en_US] My parents were right to push these things on me. I was in the fourth grade and they had just gotten divorced. It…  [Read More]

The Amityville Obsession

by Bill Brenner September 28, 2010 Children's issues

Part of my obsessive-compulsive behavior includes a study of the more morbid pieces of history. The Manson murders is one example. The Amityville murders is another. Lately, I’ve been obsessed with the latter. Mood music: [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=72rWAe0pUdQ&fs=1&hl=en_US] The match for the fire is a book I just read called “The Night The DeFeos Died” by Ric Osuna. The book goes a long way in crushing the bullshit hoax about the house being haunted. I watched “The…  [Read More]

Happily Ever After Is Bullshit & That’s OK

by Bill Brenner September 21, 2010 Addiction

Often, when depression slaps me upside the head, it’s on the heels of a prolonged period of good feelings and positive energy. Especially this time of year, when the daylight recedes early and returns late. These setbacks can be discouraging, but you can survive them with the right perspective. Mood music: It’s easy for people who fight mental illness and addictive behavior to go on an endless, futile search for the happily ever after, where…  [Read More]

A Sister’s Battle with Depression

by Bill Brenner September 7, 2010 Children's issues

This blog is chock full of my own experiences with depression and addiction. I even hint here and there about how the addictive behavior runs in the family. But I’ve avoided the story of depression among siblings until now. This post is about my older sister, who had it much harder than me, and whose progress over the years has inspired me.   I haven’t mentioned it up to this point because it’s her story…  [Read More]

Bully’s Remorse

by Bill Brenner August 19, 2010 Children's issues

There was a kid in high school everyone used to pick on. He had a monotone voice and was frail. Kids were terrible to him, including me. Mood music: [spotify:track:5Qy0zLjQy3czoj0yZ7DFkk] For you to understand what I’m about to get into, a review of the 12 Steps of Recovery are in order, with special emphasis on 8 and 9: 1. We admitted we were powerless over [insert addiction. Here’s mine]—that our lives had become unmanageable. 2. Came to…  [Read More]

The Pedophile

by Bill Brenner July 23, 2010 Addiction

Some people deserve to spend life in a box. But even they have a shot at redemption. As a dad, I have zero tolerance for anyone who hurts a child. So when I discovered someone I’ve known for many years spent a decade behind bars for pedophilia, It was like a knife in the gut. Further complicating matters is that as a recovering addict, I can’t help but feel bad for this guy. But only…  [Read More]

When Parents Fail

by Bill Brenner July 19, 2010 Children's issues

Sometimes, a child’s worst enemy is his/her parents. Mood music: “Institutionalized” by Suicidal Tendencies (The Pepsi Song): [spotify:track:1KpRBS8dbDw7LxMhuK7Bso] If I’ve learned anything on my long journey to recovery, it’s that addicts can almost always trace their behavior back to their parents. That’s certainly the case for me. My mother was always pushing food on me. She did it out of love and meant no harm, but that and the Crohn’s Disease battle certainly tilted my…  [Read More]

Real Men (and Women) Ask for Help

by Bill Brenner July 3, 2010 Communication Skills

The author learns that sometimes he has to put his pride aside to do the right thing. Mood music for this post: “Ride On” by AC/DC: [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CZo12LIWqYw&hl=en_US&fs=1] One of the more unfortunate byproducts of my OCD is that I don’t like to ask for help when I need it. This flaw has taken me to the brink of a nervous breakdown many times. When you struggle with addiction and mental disorder, you cling hard to…  [Read More]

Notes on Being a Dad, a Son and Grandson

by Bill Brenner June 19, 2010 Children's issues

The author shares some writings on his father, grandfather and kids for Father’s Day. Mood music for this post: “Holiday in the Sun” by the Sex Pistols. Has nothing to do with the topic, but tomorrow is Father’s Day and I felt like hearing some Sex Pistols. [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XWF9MMxnekQ&hl=en_US&fs=1&] Since it’s Father’s Day weekend, I thought the appropriate thing to post would be these items on my father, grandfather and my children… Snowpocalypse and the Fear…  [Read More]

← Previous Entries

Next Entries →