In church we hear the word Grace a lot. But it’s taken me a long time to get what it really means. I’m still working on that. But here’s what I got so far. Mood music: [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=puGGaFdyx5g&fs=1&hl=en_US] I like to think of Grace as the treasures I don’t deserve. I have many of those. If …
Yesterday I remembered something the priest said during his Homily at our wedding: “You marry the person you think you know, and spend the rest of your lives really getting to know each other.” Another priest at another wedding eight years later told the bride and groom: “Your job is to get each other into …
I’ve gone from sponsoring four people in my OA 12-Step program to two, and one of them only e-mails once in awhile. I’m perfectly fine with that. Mood music: [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l9jX1KAKp78&fs=1&hl=en_US] I was a reluctant sponsor in the first place. I can barely take care of myself, after all. Some days, it takes every ounce of …
Two years ago yesterday, I went on my last binge. Actually, it was more like reaching the end of a final, two-month long binge. The abstinent and sober life hasn’t been perfect by any stretch. But it beats the hell out of where I was at the start. Mood music: [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9pdQ3z1Ji8U&fs=1&hl=en_US] Appropriately, I’m leading an …
This morning I wrote about the one-two punch I got yesterday from the good and evil sides of OCD. Right now I’m experiencing a hangover as a result. Mood music: [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6Iho1V–8G4&fs=1&hl=en_US] This hangover has nothing to do with binging or drinking. I did neither, though I did think seriously about it. I lingered in the …
Something interesting happened yesterday. The OCD was running hot all afternoon and kicking my ass. Then, when I wasn’t expecting it, it gave me a second wind that worked out for everyone. Mood music: [spotify:track:4AAwBktkUB8LXGy5xNW3Rc] I was running around trying to get things done before going to a National Information Security Group (NAISG) meeting and …
One of the big things I’ve struggled with over the years is when it’s OK to be alone and when it’s not. I spent a lot of years in isolation. I’m slowly realizing isolation and alone aren’t necessarily the same thing. Isolation never amounts to anything positive for me. Alone does — when I let …
The Esquire Magazine Style Blog has a fascinating read on pant sizes that brings back a lot of fat guy memories. And though I’m not nearly as heavy as I was at the height of my binge-eating disorder, this tale of fat man’s pants still resonates. Mood music: [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q15a15LYYNg&fs=1&hl=en_US] The author, Abram Sauer, recounts a …
For reasons not immediately clear to me, I’m in the midst of a mood swing. The day started off well enough, so as a little exercise I’m going to bang on this keyboard and see if I can figure out what’s what. Mood music: [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jYUm5T8uQIY&fs=1&hl=en_US] I woke up at 4 a.m. tired but happy. I …
Sometimes God puts certain people in your life to show you how you’re screwing up and how to fix it. Sometimes, these guardian angels are disguised as people who need YOUR help. This post is about one such man. Mood music: [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wyb7dt9nz_g&fs=1&hl=en_US] In 12-Step programs anonymity is a big deal, especially in OA, because there’s …
