Coping tools

Waiting Is the Hardest Part

by Bill Brenner June 18, 2013 Compulsive behaviors

One of my biggest struggles has always been impatience. I hate waiting, whether it’s being stuck in a long line at Starbucks or getting adjusted to life’s changes. Since I recently started a new job, the challenge has grown particularly steep in recent weeks. Mood music: It’s all good, really; I’m enjoying the new job. But I’m always obsessed about where I want to be in the process, and that has made for a world…  [Read More]

Superman Was There When I Needed Him Most

by Bill Brenner June 13, 2013 Crohn's Disease

Tonight I’m doing something I never do. I’m going to a midnight movie premier, for Man of Steel. I’m no night owl, so this ought to be an adventure. But Superman has always been important to me. It seems ridiculous, having such devotion to a fictional superhero. But to be honest, the Man of Steel came into my life at a time when I really needed a superhero, even if he was from a world…  [Read More]

Black Sabbath and the Sick Bed

by Bill Brenner June 12, 2013 Coping tools

Wherein the author stays still and rocks out. Only a week into the new job, I got blasted with the stomach bug from Hell. It started coming on Monday night and kept me up all night and in bed all day Tuesday. Those who know me will tell you I get up before 5 a.m. and am usually working by 6. To spend a whole day in bed is unthinkable. Yet that’s what I did….  [Read More]

Look Out Honey, ‘Cause I’m Using Technology

by Bill Brenner June 7, 2013 Compulsive behaviors

It’s a miracle I’ve survived a decade of writing about information security in my day job, considering how technologically inept I can be. As I try to set up a new analytics tool for this blog, get accustomed to the daily use of Skype and install work email on my Android, I find that my OCD is off the charts. I keep hearing this in my head: “Look out honey, ’cause I’m using technology! Ain’t…  [Read More]

Review: Pop Gun’s “American Soul”

by Bill Brenner June 6, 2013 Music therapy

Music is one of my main coping tools, and I’ve latched on to a new CD from some old friends that I know will get me through the stresses of a new job and the slow commute that goes with it. I’ve already determined that Pop Gun’s American Soul is an excellent soundtrack for ensuring the painful wind from the Longfellow Bridge across Storrow Drive and onto I-93. I could swear at the drivers around…  [Read More]

Five Things That Overwhelm Me

by Bill Brenner May 23, 2013 Coping tools

Though I got rid of the fear-based anxiety that kept me indoors and afraid of everything, I still have moments when I get overwhelmed. Mood music: [spotify:track:2uKcU4FPX5eOjmd6RWb9OF] Call it sensory overload or severe impatience, if you will. Or perhaps the latter two are mere byproducts of the first. Here are some examples: Long lines. Whether it’s waiting for a seat in a restaurant, for entry into a movie theater or for boarding a boat, long…  [Read More]

My Therapist Fired Me

by Bill Brenner April 29, 2013 Coping tools

For the first time in many years, I have no therapist. No shrink to call my own. The guy who worked me through five years of challenges officially fired me Friday. Mood music: [spotify:track:28clONjZmul6FjfO6tZQDE] Maybe it was all the times I walked into his office with a huge cup of Starbucks bold. He was always on me about quitting coffee because it’s “just another drug.” Bringing coffee to my appointments was my way of telling…  [Read More]

Human Tourniquets And Freaks Who Love Them

by Bill Brenner March 29, 2013 Communication Skills

I originally wrote this three years ago. Looking at it again, it’s an important post describing a time when not even best friends were safe from my insanity. I’ve updated it for the present.  Mood music: [spotify:track:2YGwSRjcY4Hjz6fktW9619] You know the type. They hang  out with people who act more like abusive spouses than friends. They are human tourniquets. They absorb the pain of their tormentor daily and without complaint. This is the story of the…  [Read More]

I Forgot to Trust God, Now I’m Paying for It

by Bill Brenner March 21, 2013 Faith

I got out of bed this morning after another rotten sleep and it hit me: I’ve been having trouble sleeping through the night and controlling daytime anxiety because I’m in one of my classic control freak-outs, in which I get depressed because I am anxious about everything and want to control it all. In other words, I’ve been stewing over things beyond my control and forgetting to put my trust in God. Mood music: [spotify:track:7v0mtl6oInUtHOmTk2b0gC] Big,…  [Read More]

‘Help’ Might Be the Best Four-Letter Word Out There

by Bill Brenner March 6, 2013 Mental health

A topic I’ve visited often here is the shame people feel in asking for help. When we do so, we think we’re being weak, selfish and all-around pathetic. But, as I’ve said, that’s bullshit. Another blogger made the point so eloquently this week that it must be shared. Mood music: Jennifer Pastiloff is a writer, retreat leader and yogi with a popular blog called The Manifest-Station. Monday, at the very end of “Bitch Slap It,”…  [Read More]

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