Depression

The Third Brother

by Bill Brenner January 9, 2010 Depression

Remembering Peter Sugarman, another adopted brother who died too early — but not before teaching the author some important lessons about life. The first time I met him was my second day as a reporter for The Stoneham Sun. He was an oddball who wore a jacket and tie to go with his sneakers and sweatpants. He was rail thin with a mustache that could comfortably hide a pound of whatever crumbs got caught there….  [Read More]

Marley and Me

by Bill Brenner January 8, 2010 Addiction

The author describes the second older brother whose death hit harder than that of the first. Mood music: [soundcloud url=”http://api.soundcloud.com/tracks/48842027″ iframe=”true” /] It doesn’t seem right that a friend’s death would hit me harder and fuel my insanity more than the death of a biological brother. But that’s what happened. This is the story of Sean Marley, who introduced me to metal music, taught me to love life, and whose death was one of the…  [Read More]

Lost Brothers

by Bill Brenner January 7, 2010 Children's issues

When my older brother died Jan. 7, 1984, a trend began where I would befriend people a few years older than me. A couple of them would become best friends and die prematurely themselves. It was also the day that sparked a lifelong fear of loss. It’s been so long since Michael was with us that it’s sometimes hard to remember the exact features of his face. But here’s what I do remember: We fought a…  [Read More]

How To Play Addiction Like A Piano

by Bill Brenner January 6, 2010 Addiction

The author admits that when an obsessive-compulsive person puts down the addiction that’s most self-destructive, a few smaller addictions rise up to fill the void. But what happens when the money runs out? Mood music: I hear it from addicts all the time. They put down the thing that’s caused the most chaos and heartache in their lives, but then they find themselves latching onto smaller addictions to fill the hole. Chain smoking, for example….  [Read More]

Prozac Winter

by Bill Brenner January 2, 2010 Depression

The author discovers that winter makes his depression worse and that there’s a purely scientific explanation — and solution. My therapist and I recently agreed that my Prozac intake should go up a bit for the duration of the winter. I’m doing well for the most part, but there’s a three-hour window of each day — usually late afternoon — where my mood slides straight into the crapper. The reason is simple: People who suffer…  [Read More]

Scaring the People in Your Life

by Bill Brenner December 28, 2009 Love

The author is hearing from a lot of old friends shocked to read about his past. Thing is, basket cases are good at hiding their craziness in public. To most of my family, the stories I tell in previous posts aren’t all that surprising. They were there. My in-laws may not have known everything that was going on back in the day, but they saw my quirks. Mood music: [spotify:track:78iMIaSjeVlUoNa7rehPOU] Even at work, my quirks…  [Read More]

OCD Diaries 12-27: Edge of a Relapse

by Bill Brenner December 27, 2009 Addiction

The author comes dangerously close to a relapse, but lives to fight another day. Mood music for this entry: “Accidents Can Happen,” by Sixx A.M.: [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nan4Kdtz-9w&hl=en_US&fs=1&] It was bound to happen sooner or later. That moment where the addiction would come calling again. [Instead of retreading my history of addiction here, I’ll point you toward the entry that gets into it all: A Most Uncool Addiction.] I put down the flour and sugar — my…  [Read More]

Fear Factor

by Bill Brenner December 23, 2009 Children's issues

In this installment, the author describes years of living in a cell built by fear, how he broke free and why there’s no turning back. “The only thing we have to fear is fear itself.” — Franklin Delano Roosevelt This morning I led a meeting of Over-eaters Anonymous, a task that included standing before a room of people for 30 minutes to tell my story of OCD, addiction and recovery. It was my third time…  [Read More]

The Bad Pill Kept Me From The Good Pill

by Bill Brenner December 10, 2009 Addiction

In a previous post I mentioned that I take medication for OCD: Prozac. It’s been extremely helpful, but it took a long time for me to even consider trying it. Here’s why: Mood music: As a kid sick much of the time with Chron’s Disease, I was often put on the maximum dose of a drug called Prednisone. The side effects were so horrific that I forever after resisted the idea of taking medication until…  [Read More]

More On Famous People With Mental Illness

by Bill Brenner December 7, 2009 Depression

A good list on the subject is available from the  National Alliance on Mental Illness, NH branch. A few of those on the list: Art Buchwald, Columnist Depression Drew Carey, Actor Depression Winston Churchill “Had he been a stable and equable man, he could never have inspired the nation. In 1940, when all the odds were against Britain, a leader of sober judgment might well have concluded that we were finished,” wrote Anthony Storr about…  [Read More]

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