This picture was created with ink, wine, lime juice, coffee, tea, cola, soy sauce, hot sauce, and, as Eddie writes, a thought about what has passed. The creature in the picture hangs its head low, eyes too mired in the past to see the present.
Regrets? I have them.
Some people say they have none, but I never believe them. Even when life has worked out for the best, there are still those moments in life we would happily see erased.
Some of my biggest regrets:
- That I didn’t see the full depth of a best friend’s depression until it was too late.
- That I’ve been an asshole at certain points in my career, especially during the newspaper days.
- That I couldn’t do more to end some family estrangements — impasses in which I was far from blameless.
- That I didn’t get more time to learn from my older brother.
- That I’ve fallen to addiction so many times.
But here’s the thing about regrets: You can’t change what’s in the past. You can let the memories rip you apart, or you can learn from the experiences and invest it in being a better person.
The beast eventually has to raise its head, refocus its eyes and move on. Otherwise, it will wither and die.
I chose the former to the latter long ago. The thing is, despite my regrets, I really wouldn’t change a thing. Those experiences made me the man I am today. And despite the flaws that remain, I like who I am.