Bill Brenner

It’s a Long Road Through Self-Hatred

by Bill Brenner March 4, 2016 The stormy past

Given my normally upbeat persona, this might surprise you: Once upon a time, I hated myself. I hated a lot of people, but none more so than myself. The worst of that hatred came after I started facing my demons. Mood Music: I disliked myself before I started to tackle the demons with therapy. A couple years into that therapy, the self-loathing deepened. I had learned much about who I was and how I got that…  [Read More]

Packing for #RSAC 2016: An OCD Case Study

by Bill Brenner February 22, 2016 OCD

At the end of the week, I’ll be packing for five days in San Francisco, where I’ll write about the goings-on at RSA Conference 2016. When you have OCD, packing a suitcase is as ritualistic as the compulsive hand washing you’ve heard about. Mood music: Before I had the OCD under control, packing was an all-day affair. I’d line up all my clothes and accessories in order of the days I planned to wear them….  [Read More]

What Shutting People Down Says About You

by Bill Brenner February 18, 2016 Communication Skills

I’m someone who believes in full, frank communication. It’s essential for plans running smoothly and people not misunderstanding each other. There’s a certain personality type that gets in the way of that every time. And it makes my blood boil. Mood music: It’s the person who shuts you down when you broach a subject they don’t want to talk about. They put up their hand and start rattling off a litany of reasons they’re brushing…  [Read More]

4 Tips to Beat Fear and Anxiety at #RSAC2016

by Bill Brenner February 3, 2016 Infosec

The first time I attended RSA in 2005, fear and anxiety threatened to consume me. I feared the flights, the crowds and the prospect of failing professionally. Fast-forward to 2016: I’m a veteran infosec journalist who has been to too many conferences to count. I can’t say that I’m done with fear and anxiety, but I’ve brought it largely under control. I’ve met a lot of people who suffer the same debilitating anxiety I used to experience over…  [Read More]

Potential Positive of “CSI: Cyber” at RSA Conference 2016

by Bill Brenner January 27, 2016 Infosec

The information security community is losing its collective mind because actors from the much-maligned CSI: Cyber TV series are on the keynote schedule for RSA Conference 2016. Dave Lewis, writing as @gattaca, captured the sentiment: Wait…wait… just…wait. Actors from CSI:Cyber are giving keynotes at RSA? O_o A lot of analysis has been devoted to RSA’s decision. I like the suggestion Violet Blue makes about how maybe, just maybe, RSA is playing a clever joke on us: What if RSA’s ongoing keynote…  [Read More]

The Dark Side of Mindfulness

by Bill Brenner January 25, 2016 Coping tools

Mindfulness has been important for my OCD and anxiety management. When used in the right amounts, the tools are immensely helpful. But mindfulness has a dark side, too. Mood music: Dawn Foster points out the dangers in a post she wrote for The Guardian that asks “is mindfulness making us ill?” In the article, we hear from a 37-year-old woman named Claire, who started suffering from panic attacks and depression when she started taking a mindfulness course. The mindfulness training dregded…  [Read More]

Using Mental Illness to Get Attention

by Bill Brenner January 19, 2016 Compulsive behaviors

I came across an interesting article on the AG News site listing 10 traits of someone who uses mental illness to get attention. A couple years ago it would have offended the hell out of me. But knowing myself as I do today, I see a lot of truth in there. Mood music: People with big egos often think of themselves as supremely awesome and interesting, even when they’re not. As I’ve said before, we OCD…  [Read More]

The Humanity of ShmooCon

by Bill Brenner January 15, 2016 Work-life balance

I’m missing the ShmooCon hacker conference for the second year in a row because of family activities. But it remains a favorite of mine for several reasons. One is how its not afraid to explore how the human condition affects the security profession. Mood music: For starters, ShmooCon has given Johnny Long a platform. Long, one of the world’s foremost hackers, has given presentations on why he started Hackers for Charity, a nonprofit organization using the skills…  [Read More]

Memorial Service for Ian “Lemmy” Kilmister

by Bill Brenner January 10, 2016 Heavy Metal

Those who know me are well aware that I’m a huge fan of Motorhead — particularly founder, singer and bassist Ian “Lemmy” Kilmister. For those who want to watch the full memorial service, click below.

Dear Prudence, I’m Coming For You

by Bill Brenner January 4, 2016 Coping tools

By the end of 2015, I made a decision: I wasn’t going to let newfound pressures and responsibilities overtake the most important things in my life. Managing the loose ends of a family business — a task I inherited when my father died in June — had done just that. It was time to stop. I asked a friend for advice, and he told me to practice prudence. Prudence is about using reason to govern…  [Read More]

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