Addiction

Good Anonymity Vs. Bad Anonymity

by Bill Brenner March 30, 2011 Addiction

In the halls of recovery and in my daily work I deal a lot with anonymity. People hide behind it for good and bad reasons. This is where I separate the honorable folks from the cowards. Mood music (Click the “Watch it on Youtube” link. It’s worth it): [youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mxMHtjQW6ZQ&fs=1&hl=en_US&rel=0] I’ve met a lot of inspirational people who prefer to keep their identities hidden with good reason. In the 12-Step program I embraced to overcome…  [Read More]

How I Can Be Happy Despite Myself

by Bill Brenner March 29, 2011 Addiction

I see a lot of moody people out there on Facebook and Twitter these days. Though I try not to put random complaints on my wall, my darker moods often come across in this blog. But in the big picture, I’ve found ways to be generally happy despite myself. Mood music: Allow me to share. But first, a couple acknowledgements: 1.) I stole this post’s title from somewhere. 2.) I readily admit that despite what…  [Read More]

Change Is Pain, But Not Impossible

by Bill Brenner March 28, 2011 Addiction

Last night’s 12-Step meeting reminded me of just how hard real change is. I used to measure change by who won the next election. I’ve realized that the only real change that matters is within myself. Naturally, it’s the hardest, most brutal kind of change to achieve. Mood music: [youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yqkxDgCIsOw&fs=1&hl=en_US&rel=0] Last night’s AA Big Book reading focused on steps 8, 9 and 10: 8. Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and…  [Read More]

What’s This Freakin’ Blog Really About, Anyway?

by Bill Brenner March 17, 2011 Addiction

I’ve gained several new readers in the past month. They have a lot of questions for me, which I like and appreciate. The most common question goes something like this: “What exactly is the focus of this blog?” Mood music: [youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N4eVul99m50&fs=1&hl=en_US&rel=0] It’s a fair question. Here’s the explanation. In this case the embedded links are important to seeing the whole picture. But don’t try to read them all at once. That would be insanity….  [Read More]

Sympathy for the Unsympathetic

by Bill Brenner March 8, 2011 Addiction

I tend to get a lot of mail from people who read this blog, particularly the stuff about the rougher parts of my life. God Bless ’em, because they’re good people who want to buck me up. But I think they misunderstand where I’m coming from sometimes. Mood music: [youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yvJGQ_piwI0&fs=1&hl=en_US&rel=0] There are days when my posts cross over to darker territory, especially when a wave of depression or OCD moment hits. I also do…  [Read More]

Tension Mounts, On With The Body Count

by Bill Brenner March 7, 2011 Addiction

My editing background noise this afternoon is the first album from Body Count, the metal band with Ice-T on vocals. Some of it is uncomfortable to listen to. But, truth be told, I absolutely adored this album back in 1992. Mood music: Listening to it now, I shake my head at the liberal use of the N-word. I hate that word. But because an African American was singing it, the 22-year-old me thought it was…  [Read More]

12 Steps: The Ultimate Swiss Army Knife

by Bill Brenner March 7, 2011 Addiction

Last night’s AA Big Book study group meeting really drove home that this program is like a Swiss Army Knife that’ll cut through any number of things that hold us back. As you know by now, I use the 12-Step program to maintain my sobriety and abstinence in the face of a devastating binge-eating disorder. But it’s done so much more than help me manage addictive behavior. It has brought me closer to God and…  [Read More]

When The Grass is Greener on Your Side

by Bill Brenner March 4, 2011 Addiction

I had an eventful trip to the therapist this morning. I had a migraine and was trying hard not to puke all over his nice blue carpet. There was couple’s counseling going on in the office next door, and the walls seemed awfully thin. You could hear pretty much everything, including the wife going into a rage at her husband. Their therapist seemed to be making a valiant effort to hold it all together. My…  [Read More]

Vince Neil Makes Me Sick

by Bill Brenner March 2, 2011 Addiction

Updated Dec. 20, 2011: Vince Neil suggested in an interview that he might leave Motley Crue next year. Maybe they’ll let John Corabi back in. I always liked the album he did with them… I’m a big Motley Crue fan. Their music helped me process all the anger of my teens and in adulthood Nikki Sixx’s story of sobriety inspired me to take a long, hard look in the mirror. But as I watch a…  [Read More]

Let He Who Is Without Sin Stone Charlie Sheen

by Bill Brenner March 1, 2011 Addiction

As a society, we love to tear other people down. When someone else fails, it somehow makes us feel better about the mess our own lives have become. I know, because I do it all the time. But in the case of Charlie Sheen and his public meltdown, I just can’t do it. Mood music: [youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hqd2FJF8-h8&fs=1&hl=en_US&rel=0] Sheen’s interview with ABC News’ Andrea Canning is painful to watch. His eyes are sunken into the back…  [Read More]

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