Grief management

Addiction — And Security Journalism — Showed Me That Anonymity Matters

by Bill Brenner April 27, 2012 Addiction

Journalists like me have never been particularly comfortable using anonymous sources. When you don’t name names, someone inevitably questions if your source is real or imagined. But after dealing with some addictions in recent years, I feel differently about it. Mood music: There are some important distinctions to be made from the outset: I’ve written opinion pieces in my day job as a security journalist that have been critical of the hacker group Anonymous for…  [Read More]

The Monkey Will ALWAYS Be On Your Back

by Bill Brenner April 25, 2012 Addiction

I’m standing at a bar in Boston with my wife and stepmom. They order wine and I order coffee. My stepmom beams and says something about how awesome it is that I beat my demons. I appreciate the pride and the sentiment. But it’s also dangerous when someone tells a recovering addict that they’ve pulled the monkey off their back for good. Mood music: Here’s the thing about that monkey: You can smack him around,…  [Read More]

A Death Survival Guide For Novices

by Bill Brenner April 18, 2012 Children's issues

A friend is reeling from the death of a grandparent. Outliving your older family members is considered part of the natural order, especially if it’s a grandparent. But if it’s your first taste of death, it’s got to be pretty devastating. Having experienced more than my share of friends and family dying, I figured a few words are in order. Mood music: http://youtu.be/z1yUvdQnERk I got my first taste of death the hard way, losing my…  [Read More]

When The Going Gets Tough, I Disconnect

by Bill Brenner April 17, 2012 Addiction

I’m leaving my weekly therapy sessions with a headache these days, because I’m working through another deeply embedded flaw in my soul. Mood music: It’s not nearly as bad as the therapy I had in 2004-2006, when I had to endlessly churn the sewage of my childhood memories in search of clues on what was wrong with me and how I got that way. Back then, I didn’t know myself very well. Now I do….  [Read More]

Depression Takes Another Life: Ronnie Montrose

by Bill Brenner April 11, 2012 Addiction

Depression has claimed another victim. Published reports confirm that legendary guitarist Ronnie Montrose’s March 3 death was a suicide. Many of you are unfamiliar with him, but his playing left a lasting mark on a lot of mega-star musicians, including Eddie Van Halen, who recorded four studio albums with original Montrose singer Sammy Hagar. Mood music: Montrose’s wife, Leighsa Montrose, described how badly he suffered in an interview with Guitar Player magazine: “Ronnie had a very…  [Read More]

I Pity The Fool — Especially When The Fool Is Me

by Bill Brenner April 10, 2012 Communication Skills

“I don’t know how much more I can take.” I’ve told myself that a million times, as I’m sure you have. We say it in times of desperation, pain and blueness. But here’s an uncomfortable truth — Sometimes we like feeling this way. Mood music: There’s something about feeling bad for oneself that’s so satisfying. Maybe it’s that on some level you’ve made peace with your seemingly miserable existence. It helps us get through a…  [Read More]

Celebrating A Lost Sibling

by Bill Brenner January 7, 2012 Family

My brother died Jan. 7, 1984. On this anniversary, I find myself grateful that he was in my life. He left a positive mark on me and left plenty of amusing family stories. Mood music: I’ve already written plenty about the darker side of dealing with his death. You can read about it in “Death of a Sibling” if you’re interested. In this post, I just want to celebrate a few things: 1.) Michael is…  [Read More]

R.I.P., Karen LaPierre

by Bill Brenner December 19, 2011 Faith

I’m sad to hear that Haverhill resident Karen LaPierre was killed yesterday morning by an alleged drunk driver. Mood music: Here’s what happened, as told by Eagle-Tribune reporter Mike LaBella: Karen LaPierre, who with her husband Bill LaPierre ran the Angelo Petrozzelli Food Pantry at Sacred Hearts Church, was standing behind her 2010 Ford Taurus parked in front of 55 South Main St. at 5:20 a.m. Police said she was struck from behind by a 2003 Nissan…  [Read More]

THE OCD DIARIES, Two Years Later

by Bill Brenner December 7, 2011 Addiction

Two years ago today, in a moment of Christmas-induced depression, I started this blog. I meant for it to be a place where I could go and spill out the insanity in my head so I could carry on with life. In short order, it snowballed into much more than that. Mood music: http://youtu.be/IKpEoRlcHfA About a year into my recovery from serious mental illness and addiction — the most uncool, unglamorous addiction at that — I started…  [Read More]

A Lesson From Gabby Giffords

by Bill Brenner November 18, 2011 Coping tools

I recently watched Diane Sawyer’s interview with Congresswoman Gabby Giffords and her husband Mark Kelly. To say I was moved would be an understatement. Hers is the story of a spirited fight back from near death. If you ever get the feeling you can’t do something or overcome big challenges, you should watch this. It will show you that nothing is too big to overcome. http://youtu.be/VOZgta88L5A

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