Marriage and relationships

Is It Bad That Two Family Members Are In Therapy?

by Bill Brenner November 28, 2011 Addiction

If more than one member of the same family is in therapy, is that a sign that the family is seriously screwed up? Mood music: That’s the question we are asking ourselves these days. As the reader knows by now, I’ve been in therapy for OCD and related issues for seven years. Duncan sees a children’s therapist to help him work through his ADHD. Is this family a basket case? In my opinion, it’s exactly…  [Read More]

Thankful Friday

by Bill Brenner November 25, 2011 Faith

I have much to be thankful for this morning after Thanksgiving. A list: Mood music: –Erin’s Uncle David, for letting me take his vintage car for a spin around the block. —Erin, Sean and Duncan, simply for being who they are. –My sister Stacey, husband Sean and niece and nephew Lilly and Chase, for inviting us into their home for an excellent Thanksgiving dinner. –My brother Brian, for cooking. –My kid sister Shira, for her…  [Read More]

Here’s To The Forgiving Souls

by Bill Brenner November 22, 2011 Communication Skills

A friend of mine was taken aback yesterday when I used a text she sent me in a post. I thought it would be OK because I was keeping her identity a secret. But in hindsight, I should have asked first. That’s the challenge with a blog like this. I need to take things right to the danger line to make points I feel need making. But sometimes I step over that line. I’ve worked…  [Read More]

Learn From My Mistakes

by Bill Brenner November 4, 2011 Addiction

In all my efforts to get sane a few years ago, I did a lot of stupid things. I’m sharing it with you here so you don’t make the same mistakes: Mood music: http://youtu.be/l4Xx_vjGnlo –Don’t try to control your compulsive binge eating problem by fasting. You won’t make it through the morning, and then you’ll binge like you’ve never binged before. –Don’t mix alcohol with pills that have the strength of four Advil tablets in…  [Read More]

It Changes In A Second

by Bill Brenner October 31, 2011 Children's issues

This weekend my kids learned that life can change for the worse in a split second, and that there are rarely do-overs. Mood music: Saturday we drove an hour north to Nottingham N.H. for an outdoor gathering of some friends in the security industry. Duncan was delighted to find they had a playground, and ran for the monkeybars. Before any of us had a chance to react, he slipped and landed on his wrist, breaking…  [Read More]

Before You Hate Someone For Life, Consider This

by Bill Brenner October 26, 2011 Communication Skills

We all have someone in our personal life who we hate. There’s often a good reason for it, especially if you’ve been molested. But we often loathe someone before we’ve considered all the complexities of the relationship. I’ve been there. But as I get older, the chip on my shoulder gets smaller and I’m better at seeing the other side. In that spirit, let’s consider the following: Mood music: A lot of us hate one…  [Read More]

Thanks For The Memories

by Bill Brenner October 24, 2011 Children's issues

Duncan and I took my father to the last place on Earth I wanted to be Saturday afternoon: The family business in Saugus. Some of you know it as the blue, white and gold striped building across from Kappy’s Liquor store on Route 1. I’ve been trying to keep him out of there since he was released from rehab. Given his slow recovery from two strokes, I didn’t want him climbing stairs. I also didn’t want…  [Read More]

How To Talk To A Liar Who’s Been Caught

by Bill Brenner October 12, 2011 Addiction

A reader who recently found the two posts I wrote on addicts as compulsive liars had a sad story to share. Her husband, a compulsive spender, gambler and drinker, lies to her all the time. He apparently sucks at it. She always finds out. Mood music: How, she asked me, does she deal with a person like this? She still loves him, and in many respects he’s still the great guy. But lies are a…  [Read More]

Irish Alzheimer’s: Looking For The Cure

by Bill Brenner September 27, 2011 Addiction

Alzheimer’s Disease is a terrible thing. I’ve known some precious souls trapped within that mental prison over the years, and it’s one of the saddest things to behold. But there’s another mental prison we all find ourselves in from time to time. The late Father Dennis Nason, former pastor of my church, described it as Irish Alzheimer’s. Simply put, you forget everything but the grudges. I’d like to tell you I don’t suffer from it, but…  [Read More]

Narcissism Is A Fatal Illness

by Bill Brenner September 26, 2011 Communication Skills

Call it what you will: Narcissism. Selfishness. Ego. We’re all a little full of ourselves. But people like me are worse than others. It’s a shameful thing, but it’s the truth. People with addictive tendencies tend to be the most selfish souls alive. Mood music: [spotify:track:76Je5Wklky23mVoxiRszcN] And that’s why we have Step 3 in the 12 Steps of Recovery: “Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we…  [Read More]

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