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The Pedophile, Part 3

by Bill Brenner October 6, 2010 Uncategorized

My father-in-law read my posts on the pedophile and posted a heated note on my Facebook page: “OK, YOU put this out there and say YOU have concern and wish to warn people he is on facebook. YET appear to be FEARFUL of naming this person for those of us who don’t know of whom you speak. If he is what you say then naming him will do no harm. Homeless, jobless? Where is he…  [Read More]

The Saturday Morning Ritual, Part 2

by Bill Brenner October 2, 2010 Uncategorized

Saturday morning ritual, as Sean calls it, is when the kids hang out with Dad stupid early while Mom sleeps. Mood music: [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ubZjbmA1Id0&fs=1&hl=en_US] We used to watch Sesame Street. Now me, Sean and Duncan are staring at our individual computer screens. The sounds of video games waft through the living room. I used to spend this time dreading all the things I had to do that didn’t include lying on the couch and shutting off…  [Read More]

Summer of 1990

by Bill Brenner August 28, 2010 Depression

I’m not sure why, but I’ve been thinking a lot lately about the summer of 1990. That was a rough summer with a serious streak of depression. And yet thinking about it takes me to a happy place. Mood music: [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K0z6ATxLk8Q&fs=1&hl=en_US] I’ve had to do a lot of digging into my past as part of my therapy and recovery from OCD. Sometimes I see it as a waste of time, since you can’t change the…  [Read More]

Things that DON’T Suck

by Bill Brenner August 21, 2010 Uncategorized

Since life has it’s ups, downs and constant drama, I always try to look at the everyday things to be grateful for. Sure, I struggle with OCD and addiction. Some of my relationships are strained. Life is hard. But when I step back and think it over, there’s a lot of awesomesauce oozing around me. Mood music: [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iUha_Vj1BWA&fs=1&hl=en_US] –Started the morning with coffee and an OA meeting. I led this one and told my story….  [Read More]

Putting the Fun in Dysfunction

by Bill Brenner June 25, 2010 Uncategorized

Why the author needs dysfunctional people in his life. Mood music for this post: “California Uber Alles” by The Dead Kennedys: [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UW8UlY8eXCk&hl=en_US&fs=1&] In one of our many discussions over what she doesn’t like about me and my way of life, my mother often lamented that whatever she didn’t like was “just not normal.” Truth is, I don’t think I’ve ever met a normal person in my nearly 40 years on this planet. I prefer it…  [Read More]

The 12-Step Survival Guide of Life

by Bill Brenner June 1, 2010 Faith

For those who need a 12-Step Program, here are a few lessons from the author’s personal experiences. Mood music for this post: “Rise Above” by Black Flag: [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S7Y4iUfktOo&hl=en_US&fs=1&] When you follow the 12 Steps of Recover as I do, you discover the little things in ways you never could before. Yesterday was another example. Erin, Sean, Duncan and I went deep-sea fishing with my parents and had a wonderful afternoon. One of my favorite places…  [Read More]

Cancer and The Mouth

by Bill Brenner April 16, 2010 Uncategorized

The author has some words for a kid fighting cancer. Mood music for this post: “Heart-shaped Box” by Nirvana: [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n6P0SitRwy8&hl=en_US&fs=1&] Expect a couple shorter posts today. I have a few things on my mind and don’t need many words to get out what I’m feeling. Here’s the first thing on my mind: During my teenage years, my step-sister hung out with a kid I nicknamed mouth because she had a really loud voice. As annoyed…  [Read More]

Cool Things Afoot

by Bill Brenner March 21, 2010 Uncategorized

Mood music for this post: “Shine” by the Henry Rollins Band: [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uAXL4R_keTY&hl=en_US&fs=1&] Back when I lived a life of fear and anxiety, the only thing worth doing was lying on the couch, eyes vacant and clicker in hand. What a waste. This morning I have a lot of cool things in motion that definitely would not be happening if I was still in hiding, alone with a brain spinning out of control about bad things…  [Read More]

Prozac Winter

by Bill Brenner January 2, 2010 Depression

The author discovers that winter makes his depression worse and that there’s a purely scientific explanation — and solution. My therapist and I recently agreed that my Prozac intake should go up a bit for the duration of the winter. I’m doing well for the most part, but there’s a three-hour window of each day — usually late afternoon — where my mood slides straight into the crapper. The reason is simple: People who suffer…  [Read More]

‘What the Hell Are You Doing, Now We’re Both in the Hole!”

by Bill Brenner December 9, 2009 Addiction

This West Wing clip pretty much sums up the purpose of this blog:

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