Work-life balance

The Positive Man’s Mask

by Bill Brenner September 20, 2010 Depression

My boss and good friend John Gallant once told me I’m one of the most positive people he knows. I was keeping a sunny disposition despite the Internet being down or something like that. I’m definitely a sunnier person than I used to be. To be truthful, though, sometimes it’s just an act. Mood music: [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ukHqzqZOe7g&fs=1&hl=en_US] What brings me to that line of thinking is the crime wave of depression that hit me this weekend….  [Read More]

The Power of Nothing

by Bill Brenner September 6, 2010 Marriage and relationships

I haven’t written anything new since Friday and don’t plan to today (well, except for this). Last time I took a break I got a bunch of e-mails from people asking if I was OK. I appreciate that, but no need to worry. Mood music: [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yxytSH_piRQ&fs=1&hl=en_US] The last two days I re-posted a bunch of older entries. That was for newer readers who asked me to flag older posts that were important to the larger…  [Read More]

The Breaking Point

by Bill Brenner July 27, 2010 Mental health

Even when you learn to manage OCD it’s still there, biding its time in the background, waiting for the right moment to pounce. Most of the time, it only gets the chance to pounce if you let it. Mood music: “Coming Undone” by Korn [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ioJ9ZHqzMT0&hl=en_US&fs=1] Lately, I’ve been giving the demon all the rope it needs to hang me. I’ve been pushing myself hard with work, looking for more events to travel to and setting…  [Read More]

Lessons of a Thirty-something

by Bill Brenner July 20, 2010 Addiction

The author is reflecting a lot on things that happened in his 30s. Mood music: “Lunchbox” by Marylin Manson: [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e5Fo57AXW3w&hl=en_US&fs=1] Since my 40th birthday is next month, I’m thinking a lot about the last decade. In many ways, I’m not the same guy I was when I was staring at my 30th birthday. This has been a decade of healing, with a lot of broken scabs along the way. At the start of my 30s,…  [Read More]

The Perils of Service, Part 2

by Bill Brenner July 18, 2010 Addiction

Volunteering can be a bitch, especially when you forget who you’re there to help. Mood music for this post: “My Way” by Limp Bizkit: [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PQ8Qi86i82s&hl=en_US&fs=1] Once a month, I spend a couple hours on a Saturday volunteering in the food pantry run by our church. It can be a frustrating endeavor. Part of the frustration is my own fault. I should be there more often, but I’m only there once a month because I’m spread…  [Read More]

One Happy Head Case

by Bill Brenner July 14, 2010 Gratitude

The author on how to be happy despite yourself. Or, at least, how he attempts it. Mood music for this post: “In My Life” by Ozzy (covering The Beatles): [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ByB7Id67v3c&hl=en_US&fs=1] When anyone writes about their journey from addiction and mental illness to recovery, it’s easy to focus on the darker things. But the truth is, I’m a pretty happy head case. I may be financially strapped and tired, but my head is in a better…  [Read More]

Coping With Tired: Tools of a Reformed Addict and OCD Case

by Bill Brenner July 13, 2010 Coping tools

Several writings about how the author copes with exhaustion. Mood music for this post: “I’m So Tired,” from The Beatles White Album: Someone who saw my “songs to play when tired” post asked what I do about being tied besides music and coffee. People with addictions and mental disorders are often tired — even when in recovery. These writings cover how I keep exhaustion at bay: Rest Re-defined The author finds that he gets the…  [Read More]

An OCD Incident

by Bill Brenner June 16, 2010 Mental disorders

As good as the author has gotten at managing OCD, some days it still comes crashing down. Mood music for this post: “You’re Crazy” by Guns ‘N Roses: [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d1wmwud1DXQ&hl=en_US&fs=1&] Today was not one of my better days, folks. I had an OCD moment at work. My boss was pretty forgiving about the whole thing, but I’m still pissed with myself. Before I go any further, this is not a bitch-about-work post. For starters, I have…  [Read More]

The Brenners Invade The White House

by Bill Brenner May 17, 2010 Addiction

The author on returning from a journey that would have been impossible a few years ago. It’s 5:30 a.m. and I’m running on less than four hours of sleep, so excuse any typos that follow… I’m back in my “sunrise chair” the morning after returning from one hell of a road trip that included a private tour of the White House West Wing, a stay at buddy Alex Howard’s place and a stay with our…  [Read More]

Road Kill (a Family Adventure)

by Bill Brenner May 12, 2010 Addiction

The author on why he’s taking the family on a 10-hour car ride. Mood music for this post: “Heading Out to the Highway” by Judas Priest: [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MoDbAd4fYBA&hl=en_US&fs=1&] A few years ago, this would have been impossible. I never would have put the whole family in the car and driven 10 hours south to Washington D.C. Too scary. Too much planning. Someone might break into the house while we’re gone. Well, the house part is a…  [Read More]

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