Coping tools

Skeptic Slang and Charles Manson: Six Degrees of Separation

by Bill Brenner April 17, 2010 Communication Skills

Skeptic Slang and a glimpse at mental illness in the making. Mood music for this post: “My Monkey” by Marylin Manson: A note about the music: Marilyn Manson put this on his “Portrait of an American Family” album, which was recorded in the Sharon Tate murder house. The title and chorus were taken from a Charles Manson song called “Mechanical Man.” Bits of Manson interviews are sprinkled throughout. It just seemed appropriate for some reason……  [Read More]

Why the Cigars Must Go (and Why it Pisses Me Off)

by Bill Brenner April 16, 2010 Addiction

The author needs many coaches to keep clean and sane. Sometimes it sucks. Mood music for this post: “Sludge Factory” by Alice in Chains: [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ej39l_aqkLc&hl=en_US&fs=1&] Like anyone in recovery, I rely on several coaches to keep me from falling back into the sludge pit. The OA sponsor keeps me on the path of abstinence (OA-speak for not eating compulsively; like an AA sponsor who helps you stay sober). I have to call her every morning…  [Read More]

Cancer and The Mouth

by Bill Brenner April 16, 2010 Uncategorized

The author has some words for a kid fighting cancer. Mood music for this post: “Heart-shaped Box” by Nirvana: [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n6P0SitRwy8&hl=en_US&fs=1&] Expect a couple shorter posts today. I have a few things on my mind and don’t need many words to get out what I’m feeling. Here’s the first thing on my mind: During my teenage years, my step-sister hung out with a kid I nicknamed mouth because she had a really loud voice. As annoyed…  [Read More]

Bad Behavior, Easily Defined

by Bill Brenner April 14, 2010 Addiction

The author turns to his musical hero for some easy-to-remember descriptions of depression and addictive behavior. Mood music for this post: “Pray for me” by Sixx A.M.: [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CFjz6O7ewwg&hl=en_US&fs=1&] Many times by now, I’ve mentioned that one of my inspirations for this blog is Nikki Sixx, bassist and lyricist for Motley Crue. That’s because he gave the world a naked view of his madness at the hands of addiction in his book, “The Heroin Diaries.” I’m…  [Read More]

Meet My Demon

by Bill Brenner April 13, 2010 Addiction

Why the author treats his demon like an imaginary friend, and how it helps. It won’t give up It wants me dead God damn that noise inside my head From today’s mood music, “The Becoming,” by Trent Reznor, Nine Inch Nails: [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cDfyR22u_gI&hl=en_US&fs=1&] At last night’s OA meeting, I saw quite a few people with heavy weights pressing on their minds. I won’t share details, because these meetings are all about anonymity. But it got me…  [Read More]

A Little Bitter

by Bill Brenner April 12, 2010 Addiction

The author on three of the 12 Steps he keeps tripping over. Mood music for this post: “A Little Bitter” by Alice in Chains: [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z3qpF9xUTT0&hl=en_US&fs=1&] Of the 12 Steps of Recovery, there are three  I keep tripping over: 8. Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all. 9. Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or…  [Read More]

Pieces of Mind

by Bill Brenner April 11, 2010 For travelers

This happens every time I have a week of travel. By the time Sunday rolls around, I reach a point in the afternoon where I sit in the chair by the living room window as my brain cracks into pieces. I feel a buzz, even though I’m sober. I feel some bloat, even though my eating has been clean. Mood music: “Ace of Spades” by Motorhead: [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yxJwP0izGgc&hl=en_US&fs=1&] I feel like a wheel that’s spinning so…  [Read More]

Scenes from the Airport

by Bill Brenner April 8, 2010 For travelers

The author finds airport amusement where he once found hell. Here’s what happens. Mood music for this post: “Learn to Fly” by Foo Fighters: [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1VQ_3sBZEm0&hl=en_US&fs=1&] I sit here at 6:23 a.m. San Francisco time, sitting at the gate for a flight home in an hour. Considering what I just passed through, I got here pretty quickly and calmly. Let’s back up. When I got here, the TSA line was as long as I’ve ever seen….  [Read More]

A Suicide

by Bill Brenner March 18, 2010 Coping tools

The author’s message to some people mourning a friend’s suicide. He’s been there, so maybe these words will help. Mood music for this post: “Murder in the City,” by the Avett Brothers: [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aE7rkSELM3I&hl=en_US&fs=1&] Some acquaintances in the information security community are currently dealing with something I know about all too well — a friend taking their own life. I don’t know these people very well, and I never met the woman they are now grieving…  [Read More]

5 Songs to Play When Angry

by Bill Brenner March 14, 2010 Music therapy

OK, so I’m not in the best mood this morning. Daylight-savings-time is messing with me, as are the kids. The rain that’s been pelting the windows all night disturbed my sleep, as did my getting sent to the couch for snoring too loud. None of it can really be attributed to OCD behavior. This is simply life, and the mood will pass after I’ve been to Church and we’re buried under blankets this afternoon watching…  [Read More]

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